On (finally) attending AWP
Women Who Think Too Much—I think that’s the book my Grandmother gave me many years back. She calls me overly analytical. I only read a few pages before closing it to think a bit more.
And then Just quit talking about it and see what it’s all about, my friend said this January as we walked one day, after listening to me go back and forth about whether I should attend AWP in March.
And so even though I didn’t have an MFA, didn’t have a book out, wasn’t meeting up with any MFA friends or any friends for that matter, I registered for AWP 2023 (which for those unfamiliar, is an annual writing conference that attracts thousands of writers, publishers, and educators). I decided to be extravagantly alone and to ignore the usual guilty voice in my head prattling about spending money on my art.
I was probably more resolute than usual because I had a lot of reasons this time: I was itching to get out because of COVID, my best friend was game to meet up and share a hotel anywhere I wanted, my cousin who lives in Seattle has a darling two-year-old I’d never met, and Raúl and I honeymooned there in 2008. It’s his favorite place because of Chris Cornell.
As you’ll see in my itinerary below, I ended up attending twelve panels and two off-site readings despite a few friends telling me beforehand to pace myself and take breaks at the hotel. I didn’t feel pressured to do all of this, it just happened. I think I was coasting on excitement.
I got to visit Wave Books at the Bookfair and see all their stunning monochromatic books displayed in their home city, run into Alison Swan at Wayne State University Press booth, had Nicole Walker sign a book, said hi to Jody Kaisner in the elevator (who I’d only ever known on Twitter), have a morning coffee with some of my EFA colleagues . . . I hadn’t felt this type of intellectual exuberance since grad school, or to a slightly lesser regard, during my time teaching at DePaul.
It’s impossible to ignore the financial realities of AWP in terms of accessibility. I probably won’t go again for a while because of the financial drain. But my decision to invest in my craft makes me think about all the other times money has played a role: in fact, the strongest reason I didn’t pursue an MFA and/or PhD despite really wanting to was due to financial concerns. And so I kept it safe, and I sort of continue to do so. I was recently offered a scholarship to a prestigious writing conference, but I decided not to take it because I would have still had to pay over $2,000 to get there.
And yet, on the broadest scale and ignoring the many capitalistic critiques of AWP, I found deep comfort in just being around people who value the things I value. I’m the type of person who needs to be around people, so when I got home and people asked how it went, I couldn’t think of a good way to explain, so I just kept saying I had the time of my life.
In April 2008, we were freshly married when Raúl took a photo of me in front of the iconic market holding daffodils in a paper wrap. We visited the Seattle Public Library, too, which from what I can recall doesn’t have stairs, but rather spirals outward and upward like a shell. At some point near the top, I checked my email on one of the floors and got some of the best news of my life: I found I had received a teaching assistantship, which would fund my graduate studies.
I couldn’t help but feel that same sense of promise when I landed in Seattle for AWP. Maybe I’d get some good news in this city again. And I did, checking my phone one afternoon outside the convention center. My chapbook was selected for publication. I was alone, of course, so I shared my news with a group of people standing there. We laughed and cheered together. I knew they got it. Just quit talking about it and see what it’s all about.
My AWP 2023 Itinerary
Thurs
Re-visioning History in Creative Nonfiction
(Kathleen Alcala, Teow Lim Goh, Nick Neely, Ana Maria Spagna)
Architecture of Things: A Tribute to Ed Roberson
(Evie Shockely, Philip Williams, Douglas Kearney, Nathanial Mackey, Ed Roberson)
Playing the Long Game: Novels and Memoirs Ten Years (or More) in the Making
(Katie Cortese, Deborah Taffa, V.V. Ganeshananthan, Melissa Duclos, Jai Chakrabarti)
Resisting the Narrative, Lyric Essaying the Future
(Zoë Bossiere, Erica Trabold, Jennifer S. Cheng, Jenny Boully, Krys Malcolm Belc)
How to Craft Enthralling Science Stories
(Emily Benson, Jane C. Hu, Michelle Nijhuis, Roberta Kwok, Ferris Jabr)
The Entanglements Network: Readings & Performances
Readings and performances by Vidhu Aggarwal, Madhur Anand, Rae Armantrout, Endi Bogue Hartigan, Amy Catanzano, John Cayley, Kelly Krumrie, Nick Montfort, Ed Roberson, and Edwin Torres.
Fri
Defying the Data: Literary Impostors
(Alison Kinney, Minda Honey, Natalie Lima, Denne Michele Norris, Jodi M. Savage)
Through a Literary Lens: Craft Techniques to Get You Published in Mainstream Publications
(William Dameron, Estelle Erasmus, Vanessa Hua, Hattie Fletcher, Dawn Raffel)
The New Addiction Memoir: Resisting Salaciousness and Cliche
(Nicole Shawan Junior, Lilly Dancyger, Angelique Stevens, Jessica Hoppe, Erin Khar)
A Reading of West Virginia UP & Ohio UP Authors
(Lana Austin, Courtney Sender, Joanna Eleftheriou, Sadie Hoagland, Neema Avashia, Rachel King, Kristine Langley Mahler, and Andrew Collard)
Pure serendipity here: I Ubered out to this reading and discovered Andrew Collard’s amazing new book, Sprawl, which is focused on sprawl in East Michigan, and he happens to be based in Grand Rapids.
Sat
Writing about Kith and Kin: Dos & Don’ts, Rights & Wrongs, Risks & Rewards
(Jennifer Lang, Thea Rademacher, Helena Rho, Jody Keisner, Allison Hong Merrill)
Nevertheless, They Persisted: The Writer and the Long Game
(Sara Lippmannn, Robert Lopez, Leland Cheuk, Steve Almond, Christine Sneed)
Steve Almond and Christine Sneed rocked my world at this one. So fun.
Impossible Balance: Re-Examining the Narrative about Writing and Parenting
(John Messick, Keema Waterfield, Sean Prentiss, Ukamaka Olisakwe, Rashaan Alexis Meneses)
Milkweed Presents: A Celebration of Indigenous Voices
(Debra Magpie Earling, No'u Revilla, Sasha LaPointe, Daniel Slager)
image credit: https://picryl.com/media/birds-eye-view-of-the-city-of-seattle-puget-sound-washington-territory-1878
